01.10.2025 Spiritual Friendship Is the Path   Speaking on the Buddhist concept of the kalyanamitta, or “spiritual friend,” the historical Buddha taught that “Noble friends are the whole” of the spiritual life. Not a portion, mind you, but the whole. Sounds important, to be sure. But what does it mean to be a “noble” or “spiritual friend”? Would you know how to recognize such a person? Would you know how to be such a person? This is the subject of the latest “Deep Dive” into important Buddhist concepts published by Buddhadharma and Lion’s Roar, and it’s the subject of today’s Weekend Reader. To be a kalyanamitta, as David Viafora writes in his article, “Spiritual Friendship Is the Path,” is “not just any pal you hang out with, but a virtuous friend is someone who uplifts your path to a higher level of ethical and spiritual well-being.” There are so many factors to being a noble friend: Curiosity. Listening. Inspiring. Being with. Being skillful. Being willing to work with challenges. Practicing together, and egging on our compatriots to keep on and bring the best of themselves to bear as they do. The difference it makes, knowing someone is in your corner, “sitting with you” — even if only “in spirit” as they do so online and halfway around the world — is real. It lets us know that our goal of living with less stress, and more compassion and peace, is shared. Even if we feel we’re going it alone in our practice, there is actually a world full of supporting others out there, upholding our same values and traveling our same path. So I hope you’ll take advantage of the articles featured here and in Buddhadharma’s “Spiritual Friendship” Deep Dive, and of the opportunities for spiritual friendship that are all around us. I find them enriching, potent reminders that none of us are so truly alone, and that the more we put into the idea of noble friendship, the more we and the whole world will benefit. May they do the same for you. Thanks for reading, and for your practice. —Rod Meade Sperry, editor, Buddhadharma Sangha Is More than a Community Sangha, explains Thich Nhat Hanh, is more than a community, it’s a deep spiritual practice. The essence of a sangha is awareness, understanding, acceptance, harmony and love. When you do not see these in a community, it is not a true sangha, and you should have the courage to say so. But when you find these elements are present in a community, you know that you have the happiness and fortune of being in a real sangha. ADVERTISEMENT The “Difficult Person” Exercise The Difficult Person exercise provides a tool for us to focus on one particular person with whom we are having a hard time. All of us who act as helpers, either professionally or in the ordinary relationships of our lives, will encounter situations in which it is very challenging to keep our hearts open to another person. I would like to share with you a technique that some of my students and I came up with called the “Difficult Person” exercise. Inspired by some of the teachings on exchanging oneself for other in Shantideva’s Bodhicharyavatara, it can be helpful in reconnecting us with our compassionate longings, our hearts. The Heart of Good Spiritual Friends   When we are with others in times of suffering, says contemplative care expert Koshin Paley Ellison, we can take the four noble truths as our guide. What’s a good spiritual friend in an age of pandemics, strife, and suffering? How can we show up for one another in the midst of so much hurt? The Buddha’s formula of the four noble truths has guided me through conversations with people who are struggling, and even in conversations with myself when I am struggling.